It’s been busy around here folks. That old beast of a law degree has reared it’s head again, and it ain’t pretty. Couple that with a severe lack of motivation to do anything that doesn’t involve reading magazines or novels, eating, online shopping, or watching many brand new and returning television shows and you’ve got yourself my last few weeks. I could excuse my lack of motivation by saying that its because I’m recovering from glandular fever, which would be true but not altogether accurate. In reality, I think it is a response losing some momentum (which is probably a result of glandular fever – vicious cycle, comme ci, comme ca).
Momentum – she’s a cruel mistress. If you’re not chasing momentum, she’s chasing you.
Needless to say, what with the enormous gap between posts recently, it’s pretty clear that I lost some momentum along the way. The part that I find the hardest about losing momentum is that motivation often goes with her. They just waltz away, hand in hand, partners in life and in crime.
This time of year is always a hard slog, whether you’re studying or working. Based on my own experiences, my mates who work full time are probably madly gearing up for the pre-Christmas rush that feels like a sprint, but is in fact a marathon. My student compatriots have either just come out of a heinous period of continuous assessment where simply washing your hair is an achievement, or are going into one that will be worse than the last (please, not exams). This time of year can be difficult in that it feels like there’s a looming sense of uncertainty, especially for those of us about to graduate or contemplating a big life change for the new year. For a creature of habit like myself, uncertainty is completely polarising. It is exciting at best, or all-out anxiety inducing at worst.
I’m finishing uni in around eight weeks (touch wood), and I don’t have a post-grad real world job lined up, or any travel plans, or even a summer job. I’m constantly on the receiving end of queries about what I’m doing next year, and my answer is ‘I don’t know.’ Of course, I have a vague idea of where I’d like to be and what I’d like to be doing, and there’s a rough plan, but whether or not that will come to fruition is yet another thing to add to the pile of uncertainty. The thing that I don’t mention when people ask me that oft-dreaded question? The fact that I don’t know what I’ll be doing, while momentarily terrifying, is actually really liberating and a tiny bit exhilarating. So while motivation might be on vacation, momentum feels right at my fingertips. Hard not to, when the upcoming change is utterly unavoidable. In the meantime, I’m going to make the most of being a full time student for one last time.
In a nutshell? The world is your oyster, babe. Shuck away.
How do you deal with losing momentum or motivation? x